Pray #2

I love me and me only..but God, will You let me love someone who is destined for me now, may I ? I miss him already..

Year of Tears

Yes, as stated before, this is my Year of Tears..bukan bermaksud cengeng, tapi terlalu banyak kekecewaan..
I've became a dramaqueen lately..
Kebahagiaan yg gw kira akan lasting itu udah ilang even sebelum tengah tahun, di lanjutkan dengan kabar temen deket senasib dan sepenanggungan dari th lalu bakal pergi ke Swiss paling ga tux jangka waktu 2 th, dan lagi" gw ditinggalkan oleh temen" paling deket gw di kantor, ga nanggung", 2 orang resign dan 1 nya menyusul sehabis lebaran..lengkap sudah kesedihan gw th ini..
Tahun ini banyak bgt air mata yg gw keluarin..ya ampun gw jd cengeng, ahahahaa..sejak kapan gw mau nangis"an ky gini coba? Me don't look like me..

Pending post

Thursday, July 22, 2010
Dear God,
I think I’m ok now.. No more tears came from my eyes, even sometimes I feel miserable every time the zip memory comes in mind. 
                                                                                ***
Friday, July 23, 2010
Dear God,
I’m sorry coz I broke up my words yesterday.. I cried hard.. Too many disappointment things for me.. I think this is my Year of Tears.. I feel disappointed not because of him, but because of my trusted friends.. I need to be heard, feel beloved, to be cared.. I need someone who can really stand by me in every possibility at the sad and good things of my life..
Call me egoist.. Maybe I am..
Maybe at this moment I’m counting down every little thing I’ve done as a friend to give the best I have.. Is it wrong to expect the same from someone I expected to..?
Yeah I know there are many ways to show your kindness and care for everyone.. But because of that.. I feel the emptiness.. So this is what an ‘empty’ word stands for..
Dear God,
Please heal me.. I feel miserable at the moment.. Cry is the best thing I can do to feel better now..

Stubborn

Dear God,

It hurts..
You know how I feel, rite?

I love someone who doesn't loves me back..
Being the last one to know is hurt coz once, I've been the first one..
With all the promises he made, I expected those will come true..its heart breaking when someone comes to you, promises to take care for it and gives it back..broken..it's hurt..

Dear God,

I want to stop asking 'why', but I can't.. I couldn't find the reason why these things happened.. Will You juz give me someone who really loves me as much as I love him, even bigger than me.. I already miss him, God..

I know I am stubborn and strong enuf to accept it.. I believe I can handle it wisely and forget him to let my heart try accept a new one..but I don't want to -yet-.. Am I wrong if I have a lil bit hope to get him back to me? I want him, God..

Yeah once again I know I'm a stubborn person..

Package from God

Dear God, dy ga mau pergi dari kepala nie, knp y? Makin ke sini semakin terlihat bahwa ternyata ada org yg sangat gampang untuk 'membuang' rasa sayang yang sudah diraih dengan susah payah..sedangkan aq, Kau pasti tau aq org yg seperti apa..susah untuk sayang sama org, dan sekalinya udh sayang, pasti sayang bgt..Kau tau itu kan ya Allah..
He's a perfect 'package' for me, but seems like not for me yah..?
Terima kasih sudah pernah 'menitipkan' dy untuk aq yah, everyday with him was nice, really nice ;) *yah kcuali pas ending"nya..
Will you send me a better one, God? I already missed him ;)